


It's Time

by orphan_account



Series: Patater Parents [3]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, Future Fic, Growing Up, Irina Mashkov, M/M, Patater Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2016-11-30
Packaged: 2018-09-03 06:13:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8700610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: There's nothing like your nine year old giving you the my baby's growing up crisis when she asks for a cell phone.  And when you're Kent Parson and have no idea what to do, the crisis is ten times worse.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Pretend-play convo courtesy of my nine year old on our drive home this afternoon. Probably best if you just go with it, and don't ask.

“Daddy?”

Kent looks up from his kindle, eyebrow raised at the small child stood near where his knees are crooked up, feet planted firmly against the side of the coffee table. He uses his index finger to push his glasses further up his nose. “Yes, princess?”

She sighs, brushing back a bit of hair which has come loose from her plait, and she primly sits herself near his left side. “We need to talk.”

Kent bites back a smile, knowing how seriously Irina takes these things. He’s never been very good at this. If he had a dollar for every time she’d been thoroughly pissed off with him because he couldn’t contain his giggles when she was trying to be serious, he wouldn’t need his NHL salary.  
He sets his kindle to the side, taking that moment to at least attempt to keep himself composed, and he wishes viciously that Alexei were here. He was so much better at the straight face.

“What’s up, baby girl?”

She crosses her arms over her chest. “Okay, so ... here’s the thing. I need a cell phone.”

Kent blinks at her. “A...cell phone.”

She nods sagely. “Yes. I need a cell phone. I’ve thought about it, and I’ve decided it’s time.”

“Irina?”

“Yes, daddy?”

“You’re nine.”

“And five months,” she corrects.

He blinks at her again. “You’re nine and five months. Who the fu--er. Who exactly are you going to be calling?”

“Olivia. And Melanie, and Miranda.” She says this with a tone of, ‘duh’ like he should know this already.

“I...” He blinks at her yet again, and thinks, ‘is she old enough? Do nine year olds have cell phones now? Is this...a thing?’ Then he panics because she’s nine and he’s not ready for her to do shit like have a cell phone and text people.

Never mind she’s been stealing his phone to text nearly everyone in his contacts list. Just the day before she decided to rearrange her room and sent a photo to half the fucking Dallas Stars.

The chirps hadn’t stopped yet.  
“Uh. I think I’m gonna have to talk to your papa about that one, sweetheart.” He hopes that will at least buy him some time to panic or think or...whatever.

She sighs though, and looks put out. “He’s gonna say no. He said no when I wanted a laptop.”

Which was true, although in the end Irina won that war and now had a cute, small, metallic blue laptop sat on her desk next to her plants.

“Just...we’ll see, okay.”

‘We’ll see,’ the parents’ magic words which usually meant hell no, but I need an hour before you start flipping out at me. She knew it, of course, and he could tell by the unamused expression on her face.

“I’m going upstairs to play. Can I use your phone? I wanna text bubbie.”

He reluctantly hands it over. “Do not text Segs.”

She lifts her eyebrows at him, but shrugs, sends off a text, then disappears. Kent checks it just to make sure, but the only recent thing in his outbox is the smiley face to his mother.

He holds his phone for a minute and tries not to picture things like Irina holding a cell phone or wearing a bra or driving a car because while he is excited to see the person she’s becoming he’s so, so not ready for the whole grown up thing.

He thinks about texting Jack and asking his advice, but Jack’s solution to Kent’s Kid Crisis is always, ‘Just have another one,’ which no fucking thank you. Kent loves Irina more than life itself, but he’s getting old and he’s barely got enough energy for the hockey season, let alone colic and nappies and all night bottle feeding. And there wasn’t an amount of money you could pay him to go through the whole, ‘everything was meant for my mouth, yes including this dangerous pile of expose wires that somehow magically appeared in my living room,’ stage.

So.

He texts Bittle instead.

‘Is nine too young for a cell phone? I’m asking for a friend.’

‘Tell your ‘friend’ that’s a decision which should be worked out between him and his husband. But for the record there are four kids in Amelie’s class with cell phones. And they’re six.’

“Fuck,” Kent whispers to himself. He’s pretty sure there’s a trip to Verizon in their near future.

*** 

Alexei comes home as Kent’s half asleep on the sofa. In the back of his mind, Kent hears the door open, and feels the brush of a kiss on his forehead, but he wakes long after Alexei’s gone upstairs.  
It takes him a minute to remember what he was doing, but then the whole conversation comes back. And it’s not even a crisis, really, but he feels out of his element, and he starts to panic a little over what it’s going to be like when she’s sixteen and asking to like...drive and go to parties and maybe date.

Fuck.

He is so ill prepared.

What is he even doing.

A cell phone. It’s like the beginning of the end. She’s not his baby anymore. She’s probably upstairs chatting on skype and doing her make-up and applying to college or something.

He stands up and rushes up there, to find Alexei stood outside Irina’s bedroom door. It’s cracked, and his head is leant into it, and when he catches Kent’s eye, he puts a finger to his lips.

They’ve become like fucking Russian spies, the pair of them, having had a kid. Sneaking is integral to the whole parenting thing, so they can stand outside her door for hours and usually not get caught.

“She’s playing,” Alexei breathes softly. “Is funny. So bizarre.”

Kent tips his head in to listen.

“I need you to help me with this cat,” Irina says in one pretend voice.

“No. The last time I helped you, I got arrested. And that’s not even a cat. It’s butter!” says her other voice.

“Arrested for what?”

“Wearing too many hats.”

“Well that’s a stupid thing to get arrested for. And yes, it is a cat.”

“No, it’s just a bunch of butter.”

“Yeah well...I need help anyway. Will you help me?”

“Fine, but if I get arrested, you have to get me out of jail.”

“Okay. Here, take the cat.”

“It’s butter. And how many hats do I have to wear this time?”

“Umm...only four. That’s probably fine, right?”

“Yeah. Okay...give me the cat. I mean the butter.”

Kent looks at Alexei. “What the fuck?” he hisses.

Alexei grabs his hand and drags him into the bedroom before they both dissolve into giggles. They land on the bed, and Kent curls into his husband’s body. “Did you understand any of that?”

Alexei shakes his head. “I’m listen for many minutes, not understand where she gets this. TV?”

“God only knows.” Kent turns on his back, resting his head on Alexei’s arm. “She wants a cell phone.”

“For what?” Alexei asks.

“Texting. Calling.”

Alexei snorts. “She nine years old. Who she texting?”

“Besides the fucking Stars?” Kent asks, and smacks Alexei when he laughs. “My mother. Yours. My sister. Jack and Bits. Her friends. She’s got friends with cell phones.”

Alexei ponders this. “Maybe in one year. I’m...think about it in one year. Maybe we not rush into cell phones and driving.”

Kent turns and kisses him gently. “I was hoping you’d say that. I love her, but fuck, I’m so not ready for this grown-up shit.”

Alexei cups his face. “She not even two digit yet. Is okay. We have time.”

Kent smiles, because it’s true, they do have time. A decade before she really goes out on her own, and that’s a while. And by then, Kent thinks they might be ready for it. Maybe.

“I’m bring home Chinese for dinner,” Alexei says after a minute, interrupting Kent’s spiralling thoughts.

Kent smiles at him, and kisses him again. “I fucking love Chinese.”

Alexei laughs. “I know.”

“And I fucking love you.”

“I’m know this also,” Alexei says, and rolls over, pinning him to the bed before he kisses him all over his face. “I’m go set up. Get Irinochka, come down.” He gets up, kissing Kent one last time before he heads down, and when Kent hears noise in the kitchen, he rolls off the bed.

He pauses by her room, but the play has stopped and he can hear the opening credits to Ghostbusters drifting from the tinny speakers of her laptop. He knocks, then pushes the door open and finds her cuddling with her giant stuffed Unicorn on her bed.

She looks young right now. Her curls are a mess and she’s got a smudge of something on her left cheek, and he can see her as she was five years ago--the chubby-faced toddler with curls and frilly dresses--though that hasn’t really changed much.

But her tiny-toothed smile is now a grin full of adult teeth, and her dimples are starting to fade along with her baby fat. If he thinks hard enough, he can see the adult she’s going to become, but he doesn’t let himself try that hard. Not yet.

“Papa got Chinese,” he says, and basks in her grin.

“I love Chinese.” She launches herself at him, and he picks her up--he can still do that with some ease. She still tucks her face into the crook of his neck, and holds on tight.

He smiles at her and heads for the door. “I know,” he says.

She grins at him. “I love you.”

He laughs and kisses her cheek. “I love you too.”


End file.
